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A Strong Heart
I may be a bit old school but I think that people who store all of their pictures on their smart phones are missing out on something. There is nothing like seeing a loved one’s smiling face looking down on you from a picture frame on your wall. It is both comforting and reassuring, almost like they are watching over you while you work at your desk.
As I work at my own desk I can see my Nan’s picture smiling at me. She left us too soon. She was only 65 years old when cancer took her. If one’s years here were based on merit then she should have lived to be over 100. My grandpa’s kind smile is next to hers. It has only been a few years since he passed. Sometimes I still pick up the telephone wanting to call him and tell him something that has just happened to me only to remember that he is gone. My other Nana’s picture is there too, holding the 90 years young sign at her birthday party 16 years ago. How I wish I could walk into her kitchen again, have a talk, and share a big slice of homemade Italian bread with her.
Sometimes looking at these pictures gives me a touch of melancholy and sadness. I still miss them all and I don’t feel ready to be the oldest generation yet. Most of the time, though, I only feel the warmth and joy that comes from a million loving memories that these pictures bring back. It makes me feel blessed knowing that I had them all in my life for the years that I did. It makes me want to follow their loving example in my own life as well.
A lot of people say that you have to have a hard heart to get through life. Others say a soft heart is better. I myself think that a strong heart is best. We need a heart that loves through the pain. We need a heart that keeps loving even when we lose the people we love the most. We need a heart that knows that “Anyone who lives in love lives in God, and God lives in him.” May your heart be strong then. May your love shine from your pictures and from your life.
@american
Donya Parsa
Happiness: My Pursuit Of It
"When I was young, I admired old people.
Now that I’m old, I admire wise people.
When I was a youth, I admired strong people.
Now that I’m old, I admire meek people.
When I was an adult, I admired wealthy people.
Now that I’m old, I admire happy people." ~ Matshona Dhliwayo
Since the beginning of time, humans across the globe have been pursuing singular goals: first it was sex, then it was money, now it is happiness. From the executive on Wall Street, to the sheepherder on the rural plains of Kenya, to the stay-at-home mother in China, all of us have been driven by the ceaseless desire to be happy.
What we eat, wear, and do are all expressions of our pursuit of happiness. So are the books we buy, the shows we watch, and the relationships we pursue. But, if humanity has searched for it since the beginning, how come happiness has been elusive? Should we not have found it? After all, we have gone to the moon, cured fatal diseases, and made countless discoveries in every field you can think of. Knowledge undeniably has increased, but the reality is that happiness has not.
This inspired my long, uncertain journey to find out the secrets to happiness.
I remembered the story of King Solomon, who according to the Bible was the wisest and richest man in history. He had all of the above, but he despaired in the end: "Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless." His pursuit of happiness ended miserably, as he was focused on his mind and body but at times forgot to nurture his soul. I came to the conclusion that, as humans being composed of mind, body, and soul, we must nurture all three to achieve our highest happiness.
Mind – You cannot live a happy life with sad thoughts. Timeless wisdom states that we become what we think. It therefore goes without saying that happy thoughts contribute to creating a happy life.
Body – Research has shown that the brain produces serotonin, a chemical contributing to our happiness and wellbeing. When we exercise, our bodies also produce endorphins, chemicals that reduce stress and diminish our perception of pain. Clearly, when we take good care of our bodies, our bodies take good care of us.
Soul – Researchers have been dumbfounded after finding that there is a relationship between healing and having a higher power. " The soul is the highest part of us, and if it’s nurtured, everything else – happiness, fulfillment and lasting joy – falls into place.
To help you on your happiness journey, below are ten insights I conjured up. Enjoy!
1. What you seek for others you find for yourself.
2. A heart full of joy is better than a hand full of coins.
3. Pebbles that bring you joy are better than diamonds that bring you sorrow.
4. When bad things happen to you, become wiser, not bitter.
5. The beauty that is in you is greater than the ugliness that is around you.
6. If you go to bed angry, you have robbed yourself of a chance to wake up happy.
7. Letting go of sorrow gives you enough strength to carry happiness. Letting go of anger gives you enough strength to carry kindness. Letting go of fear gives you enough strength to carry hopefulness. Letting go of resentment gives you enough strength to carry gratefulness. Letting go of disappointment gives you enough strength to carry joyfulness. Letting go of avarice gives you enough strength to carry contentedness.
8. Love subtracts sorrow, divides trouble, adds blessings, and multiplies joy.
9. Happiness cannot be bought by money, cannot be acquired by degrees, cannot be realized by power, and cannot be earned by honor; but it can be won by kindness, gained by charity, attained by goodness, and achieved by love.
10. Pleasure will make you happy for days. Wealth will make you happy for weeks. Honor will make you happy for years. Love will make you happy for a lifetime.
@american
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Give this world good energy. It will come back to you in unexpected ways.
@american
Why young people don’t buy cars and apartments anymore
Nowadays, the traditional measure of success — owning an apartment and/or a car — is out of date. An increasing number of young people around the world don’t want to buy them.
Research shows that the so-called millennial generation, who are now 30-35 years old, rarely buy houses and even more rarely — cars. In fact, they don’t buy super expensive things at all. In the USA, people under the age of 35 are called ’the generation of renters.’
Why does this happen?
Some sociologists say the current generation of young people differs from their parents’ generation. They have different values.
The youth today has reconsidered the concept of success, which means:
Successful people don’t buy property — they rent.
If you want to be considered successful, invest in experiences: travel, do extreme sports, build startups.
The point is that people now don’t want prosperity and stability — all they want is flexible schedules and financial and geographical independence.
People have started to have no interest in material things
Why own a car if you can take a cab? It’s almost a personal car with a driver. And it’s not more expensive than having your own car.
Why buy a house in a beautiful place and go there for vacation, if you can find a place to stay through Airbnb in any corner of the planet?
You don’t have to overpay for rent or buy a property in a country you love. The same thing with real estate in your hometown: You don’t know how long you’ll stay where you live.
You can take on a mortgage for 40 years, or you can accept the fact that you’ll spend your whole life in a rented place.
You’ll probably change your job in the next few years. If you rent, nothing prevents you from moving closer to the office.
According to Forbes, modern young people change jobs every three years on average.
The concept of ownership is no longer relevant
James Hamblin, The Atlantic’s columnist, explains the phenomenon as follows: ’Over the past decade, psychologists carried out a great amount of research proving that, in terms of happiness and a sense of well-being, spending money on new experiences is much more profitable than buying new things. It brings more joy.’
Experiences help us make friends
Social interaction between people is crucial to whether they feel happy or not. Talking to others and having a lot of friends makes you a happier person. But would people rather hear about how you spent a year in a wild country or about how many apartments you’ve already bought?
Remember that even a bad experience can become a good story. Material things cannot.
Buying things makes us worry
There’s one more thing. The things we own, especially if they’re very expensive, make us worry about their condition. If you buy a car, you’ll flinch every time someone’s alarm sounds outside. If you buy a house and fill it with expensive items, you’ll be afraid of being robbed. Not to mention the fact that a car can be scratched or break down, and a super expensive TV might break after a year of usage. But no one can ever take away the experiences you have.
Every purchase will go down in price over time
Our parents weren’t able to travel as often as we do. There wasn’t the possibility to have so much fun. They didn’t have so many opportunities to start a new business. Therefore, they invested in houses and cars, and we don’t want to do that. After all, every purchase, if it’s not a house or an apartment, will depreciate over time. And if we think about how quickly real estate depreciates during a crisis, then everything becomes even more obvious.
Experience is the only thing that matters: it won’t go down in price, and no one can steal it.
But India is not far behind. More and more of my friends, family and people I know who live in metros like Mumbai, Pune, Delhi and Bangalore are shifting to the above mindset.
The change is happening really fast.
And experience has become the new age motivator.
...continued...
@american
The Meaning of Life ...
"What is the meaning of life?" This is a question that we all ask ourselves at one point or another of our existence here. It is a question that I have asked myself many times over the years. The best answer that I ever came across was written by the great psychologist, Viktor Frankl who had survived the Nazi Concentration camps in World War II. Frankl wrote that "The meaning of life is to give life meaning."
When I was a young girl I gave my life meaning by simply playing, running, jumping, swimming, laughing, and riding my bike. When I went to school I gave my life meaning by learning, studying hard, getting good grades and trying to make my Mom and Dad proud. When I was a teenage I found meaning in playing sports, hanging out with my friends, and trying to impress boys... In college I found my meaning by deciding what I wanted to study and what career I wanted to preparedness for. When I was working as a teacher I found meaning in helping to open young minds to new ideas and old wisdom. When my uncle married and had children he found meaning in protecting, providing for, and watching over those he loved. When I found out both of my little cousins were mentally handicapped I found meaning in loving them, caring for them, and learning so much from them about life, love, compassion, patience, faith, and joy.
As I got older too I began to realize that meaning isn’t something that comes and goes. We can give meaning to every moment of our lives here. We can bring meaning to the thoughts we think. We can bring meaning to the things we do. We can bring meaning to the hearts we touch. All we have to do is love. It is love that gives life meaning. It is love that makes life worth living. Love is our Heavenly Father’s gift to us. Love is our gift to each other. May all of your days be full of meaning then. May all of your days be full of love.
@american
What it means to Sacrifice ...
My mom had only one eye. I hated her… She was such an embarrassment. She cooked for students and teachers to support the family.
There was this one day during elementary school where my mom came to say hello to me. I was so embarrassed.
How could she do this to me? I ignored her, threw her a hateful look and ran out. The next day at school one of my classmates said, “EEEE, your mom only has one eye!”
I wanted to bury myself. I also wanted my mom to just disappear. I confronted her that day and said, “If you’re only gonna make me a laughing stock, why don’t you just die?”
My mom did not respond… I didn’t even stop to think for a second about what I had said, because I was full of anger. I was oblivious to her feelings.
I wanted out of that house, and have nothing to do with her. So I studied real hard, got a chance to go abroad to study.
Then, I got married. I bought a house of my own. I had kids of my own. I was happy with my life, my kids and the comforts. Then one day, my Mother came to visit me. She hadn’t seen me in years and she didn’t even meet her grandchildren.
When she stood by the door, my children laughed at her, and I yelled at her for coming over uninvited. I screamed at her, “How dare you come to my house and scare my children! GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!!!”
And to this, my mother quietly answered, “Oh, I’m so sorry. I may have gotten the wrong address.” – and she disappeared out of sight.
One day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house. So I lied to my wife that I was going on a business trip. After the reunion, I went to the old shack just out of curiosity.
My neighbors said that she died. I did not shed a single tear. They handed me a letter that she had wanted me to have.
“My dearest son,
I think of you all the time. I’m sorry that I came to your house and scared your children.
I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion. But I may not be able to even get out of bed to see you. I’m sorry that I was a constant embarrassment to you when you were growing up.
You see……..when you were very little, you got into an accident, and lost your eye. As a mother, I couldn’t stand watching you having to grow up with one eye. So I gave you mine.
I was so proud of my son who was seeing a whole new world for me, in my place, with that eye.
With all my love to you,
Your mother.”
@american
The Seven Wonders of the World...
Anna was a 9-year-old girl from the small village. She finished attending elementary school till 4th grade at her village. For the 5th grade onwards, she will have to get an admission in a school at a city nearby. She got very happy knowing that she was accepted in a very reputed school in a city. Today was the first day of her school and she was waiting for her school bus. Once the bus came, she got in it quickly. She was very excited.
Once the bus reached to her school, all students started going to their classes. Anna also made it to her classroom after asking fellow students for direction. Upon seeing her simple clothing and knowing she is from a small village, other students started making fun of her. The teacher soon arrived and she asked everyone to keep quiet. She introduced Anna to the class and told that she will be studying with them only from today.
Then the teacher told the students to be ready for the surprise test now! She told everyone to write down the 7 wonders of the world. Everyone started writing the answer quickly. Anna started to write the answer slowly.
When everyone except Anna had submitted their answer paper, the teacher came and asked Anna, “What happened Dear? Don’t worry, Just write what you know as other students have learned about it just a couple of days back”.
Anna replied, “I was thinking that there are so many things, which 7 I can pick to write!” And, then she handed her answer paper to the teacher. The teacher started reading everyone’s answers and the majority had answered them correctly such as The Great Wall of China, Colosseum, Stonehedge, Great Pyramid of Giza, Leaning Tower of Pisa, Tajmahal, Hanging Gardens of Babylon etc.
The teacher was happy as students had remembered what she had taught them. At last the teacher picked up Anna’s answer paper and started reading.
“The 7 Wonders are – To be able to See, To be able to Hear, To be able to Feel, To Laugh, To Think, To be Kind, To Love!”
The teacher stood stunned and the whole class was speechless. Today, a girl from the small village reminded them about the precious gifts that god has given us, which are truly a wonder.
Moral: Value what you have, use what you have, trust what you have. You don’t always have to look away to find an inspiration. God has given you all the strength to reach your goals
@american
Continued...
Why young people...
Very soon youth in developing cities will understand the power of the above and adopt it.
Its an evolutionary change, where we are moving away from Materialistic value to Higher Emotional Value to Life!
If we consider the Maslows Pyramid, this is a further step towards greater happiness.
Detachment is essential to experience Bliss!
If you still depend on Materialistic approach to happiness.. Then this is a great time in the social evolution of society to experience the other side, without being considered a Rebel or having to break too many comfort zones!
@american